C H I L D R E N ' S M E N T A L H E A L T H
Helping children feel safe and understood
Children can experience anxiety, dysregulation, and ADHD. Calm adults, steady routines, and the right support make a real difference.
Child anxiety
Anxiety in children often looks different than it does in adults. Here are some signs to watch for.
The stress response activates
A child's body can move into fight, flight, or freeze when the amygdala detects danger, whether the danger is real or perceived.
The alarm becomes too sensitive
Like a smoke alarm reacting to burnt grilled cheese, a child's amygdala may sound the alarm even when they are not in danger.
Daily life becomes affected
When anxiety begins to interfere with daily life, look for a professional child therapist who can provide additional tools and guidance.
Peace can be learned
With understanding, encouragement, and the right help, children can learn coping skills, build confidence, and experience greater peace.
Helping children
- Create a calm and predictable environment and routine.
- Listen to and accept your child's worries without dismissing them.
- Encourage small steps of courage.
- Teach simple coping tools, like deep breathing or noticing things around them, when they are calm.
- Ask the child to name the anxiety and help them talk back to it, such as, “You are not the boss of me.”
- Do not punish anxiety-driven behaviour. Try to understand what led to it and offer support.
Understanding dysregulation
When a child becomes dysregulated, their nervous system becomes overwhelmed. The brain shifts into survival mode, making it hard for the child to manage emotions, behaviours, and reactions. A child may cry intensely, become angry, act impulsively, withdraw, or seem unable to calm down.
This is not intentional behaviour. Dysregulation is different from a tantrum because the child has very little control over their body or emotions. Big feelings mean a child needs help, not blame.
This is not intentional behaviour. Dysregulation is different from a tantrum because the child has very little control over their body or emotions. Big feelings mean a child needs help, not blame.
Supporting dysregulation
- Keep yourself calm so you can respond with patience and grace instead of reacting.
- Remember your child is not acting this way on purpose; do not punish them.
- Reduce noise, lights, demands, and expectations if needed.
- Use a slow, soft voice.
- Wait until the child's body settles before talking about the situation.
- Connect with curiosity about what happened, what they felt, and what it was like for them.
- Notice what may have set off the dysregulation so you can prepare for next time.
- Teach coping skills when the child is calm, such as slow breaths, movement, or asking for help.
- Reach out to a professional child therapist for support for your child and for yourself.
ADHD
Child ADHD is a neurodevelopmental condition that affects attention, impulses, and energy levels. It is not caused by bad parenting or laziness.
Attention and focus
Children with ADHD may have difficulty focusing, following instructions, finishing tasks, and staying organized.
Impulses and energy
ADHD can affect impulses and energy levels. Some children are more hyperactive or impulsive, and some have a combination of both.
Emotional regulation
Children with ADHD may have difficulty waiting their turn or managing emotions, but they also often bring creativity, curiosity, friendship, and quick thinking.
Helping children with ADHD
- Create clear and consistent daily routines.
- Break tasks into small, manageable steps.
- Give simple, direct instructions one at a time.
- Give specific praise when you notice effort and progress.
- Provide many movement or physical activity breaks.
- Reduce distractions during homework.
- Use visual schedules, timers, and reminders.
- Stay calm and patient during challenging moments.
- Help your child practice organizational skills.
- Encourage healthy sleep, nutrition, and exercise.
- Build on your child's strengths and interests.
- Work closely with teachers and other adults involved in your child's life.
- Connect with a child therapist to learn more skills for managing ADHD.
A gentle reminder
Children are not born with the ability to regulate every emotion; this skill develops over time. Young children borrow regulation from adults, which means calm adults help children feel calm. Supporting a child's mental health is patient, grace-filled work.
Related resources
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